Mara Prose Publishing

The ‘shoulds’ paralyze me
They lead to the what ifs, the maybes and the could haves
My target is never stagnant and does not allow me to move
I am unhinged and hindered

My doubts subdue me
My failures asphyxiate me
My gains seem miniscule

My mind prepares a catechism
It just can’t let me rest
What’s right?  What’s wrong?
What’s my truth?  Am I really strong?

My curiosity sacrifices me to injunction
I trial. I tribulate.
I wonder. I investigate.

What I desire is not always mastered
What I master is not always consummated
So I freeze and second guess

The shoulds paralyze me
I am a hostage to its psychological strangulation
I must bargain for my release
I have to be aware of my capabilities
I must believe in all that is me
Even if that means leaving life more of a mystery

The shoulds are a guide, a formula that doesn’t always add up
Convention can equate to confinement
Rejection can equate to judgment
But the world is not our jury
Yet, the shoulds still paralyze me

~ Author Mara Prose