Please enjoy this dating tale from someone very close to me!  It is too funny!

She said to herself, why not?  It had been months since her separation and she was finally ready to open herself up to the dating pool.  She really didn’t want anything too serious, just maybe grab a bite to eat with someone.

Anthony seemed like a nice guy.  He had been very respectful in his messages and Stacey felt like having someone join her for dinner at a new Greek restaurant around the corner from her job.  So she invited Anthony and was pleased when he accepted.

When Anthony arrived, he was a true gentlemen.  He gave Stacey a friendly hug and opened the door for her.  Stacey grabbed a menu and Anthony asked what kind of restaurant it was.  She let him know it was a Greek restaurant and wasn’t too bothered when he asked “what is that?”  She simply took it as a sign of him not being exposed to this type of food, so she explained the menu.

Stacey recommended the gyro since he was a newbie and let the cashier know it was his first time.  The cashier proceeded to make recommendations and explained how they generally make the gyro in Greece with pork and that he should try it that way.  After their order was placed, Anthony asked “So Greek food is food from Greece?”  Stacey was speechless at first because she really didn’t think he was serious.  Seeing that he was, she replied yes and changed the subject.

They sat down and started to chat to get to know each other.  Stacey asked Anthony what he liked to do for fun.  Anthony promptly replied “go to strip clubs, hole in the walls and pool halls.”  Okkkk, Stacey thought.  Then Anthony asked her did she drink a lot because he really didn’t.  Stacey told him she drank socially but not too often.  Anthony said” oh good, I am not a big drinker either, I like my weed.”  Okkkkk again, this date was quickly going south.

Stacey’s phone rang and it was her friend Darlene.  She sent it to voicemail but not before Anthony got a good look at the picture.  He then asked her “do you have a lot of white friends?”  Stacey just stared at him, she didn’t know how to respond to such a stupid question.  But Anthony really wasn’t concerned with her answer and proceed to tell her how he didn’t have a lot of white friends because there was nothing to talk about with them.  Okkkk, Stacey was ready to go now.

Anthony eye’s began to half close and Stacey asked if he was ok.  He told her the drink was too strong but he had barely touched his drink, so Stacey had her suspicions.  Besides, the drink really wasn’t that strong at all; it was more of a mango flavored slushy with a hint of alcohol.  In an attempt to salvage something about the date, Stacey asked him how he liked his gyro.  He said it was all right but he would have preferred some chicken wings.  Stacey wanted to throw her hands up in surrender.  He was a lost cause.

The rest of the date continued with Anthony complaining how sleepy he was but he didn’t want the date to end because he was enjoying himself.  She wasn’t sure what he was enjoying but oh well, whatever.  Then he told her about being in the army and how his ex never appreciated all the worldly things he tried to show her.  He bragged about going to Dubai several times.  So he went to Dubai and supposedly is a man of the world, but didn’t know that Greek food was food from Greece?  Okkkkkk, yeah right!

Stacey was too nice to abruptly end the date but she was so relieved when the manager came out and said they were closing.  Anthony walked her to her car and leaned in for a hug but Stacey turned to open her door.  She gave him a polite handshake and told him to text to let her know he made it home safely.  She never received that text much to her relief and vowed to screen her potential dates more thoroughly next time.

~ Mara Prose